Nation Shudders At Large Block Of Uninterrupted Text

March 12, 2010

Breaking news:

Dumbfounded citizens from Maine to California gazed helplessly at the frightening chunk of print, unsure of what to do next. Without an illustration, chart, or embedded YouTube video to ease them in, millions were frozen in place, terrified by the sight of one long, unbroken string of English words.

"Why won't it just tell me what it's about?" said Boston resident Charlyne Thomson, who was bombarded with the overwhelming mass of black text late Monday afternoon. "There are no bullet points, no highlighted parts. I've looked everywhere—there's nothing here but words."

Be warned that [the article about this terrifying outbreak of prose][to] is itself a little wordy. (via)
[to]:http://www.theonion.com/content/news/nation_shudders_at_large_block_of